Paradox Blog

Have you noticed how men hardly notice what women are wearing? They probably notice more what women are not wearing. Christmas Party, the showcase of the glamorous dress we wear only this once (or twice if you have more than one such party to go to) a year. Before becoming a mother, I used to wear this tiny velvet dress and my heeled yet comfy shoes (for dancing) to the party. Christmas party routine started in the early afternoon, taking a shower, washing my hair, lathering lots of lotion all over myself, drying and setting my hair, shaving you know where, putting on a dab of perfume, selecting the right panty hose, putting on undergarment and panty hose, putting on makeup, putting on party dress and heels, perusing myself in front of a full length mirror, trying on jewelry, deciding what if any jewelry to wear, trying on coat and handbag to go with the dress and the weather of that day (a December day in Bay Area can be fall like or winter like). Believe it or not, all these took up the entire afternoon.

This past December, it was different. For one thing, I could no longer fit in my velvet dress. At first we weren't planning to go, saving the trouble of finding a baby sitter. But at the last minute, my husband's boss urged him to go. We knew something's up and decided to check it out. The day before, we scrambled for a baby sitter. We turned to our nice neighbors for help, hoping that having three young kids themselves, adding one more won't spoil their day too much. They gladly said yes. Forget about renting a tuxedo as my husband would use to do and I'd just find something I could fit in from the closet. Twenty four hours before the party, we could feel the anxiety simply because it would be the very first time we left behind our baby to go anywhere.

On the day of the party, we planned to be there around eight, it is an hour's drive from our place to the party. At 5 o'clock, we cooked a quick meal for our one year old, fed her and bathed her. We took turn to dress up. It was now close to 7. Stocking up a bag of her favorite toys, snacks and diapers to bring over to our neighbors, writing down phone numbers of how to reach us in case of emergency, we headed over to our neighbor's. Apprehension started to show on our daughter's face. She clinched to her father's shoulder a little tighter. As we were putting her down, her face started to tense up. We turned phone and headed for the door. She started to cry. Our neighbors urged us to go and assured us that she would stop in a while. Promising we would be back around 11, we headed for our car and drove off.

In the car, switching on the mobile phone in case our neighbor called, we hardly heard what music was playing on the radio. We were more intensely listening for phone rings. Arriving at the party a little over 8. Checking the coats but keeping my bag with the mobile phone close to me. We chit-chatted, sampled the buffet, and from time to time, put our ears on my hand bag to make sure the phone did not ring. Half past nine, we looked around hoping to find any sign of a speech by upper management, but no one was moving. If we want to be home by 11, we could only afford to stay till 10. Finally at close to ten, waiters came to urge everybody to gather around the dance floor. The CFO made some jokes, introduced the CEO. The CEO opened with the usual motivational speech and announced this years' awards. Indeed, my husband got one of the awards. He's excited, I was happy for him. People gathered around to congratulate him. But the clock had struck for Cinderella. We got to go. We were already half an hour late.

We got home around 11:30 to find our baby sound asleep in our neighbor's lap. They told us she had resisted for a while and cried for about 20 minutes before she finally calmed down and started playing with her toys. We thanked them over and over again and went home with our baby. Looking down at the little angelic face in our arms, we knew in our heart no award could compete with her. It was a nice evening out, a change of pace, even nicer to have been recognized at work, but we sure were glad to be home.